All posts by CJ Embers

CJ Embers is a Canadian fantasy author of three published novels, with many more on the way.

These Three Words

It forms on my tongue but it cannot be spoken.
Not from choice, but of a soul that has been broken.
Healing takes time, and it will be slow,
So I’m sorry if I never say it, but this I do know…

I would give you the world, were it mine to surrender,
To show you the beauty and all its splendor.
Together, we would greet the glittering seas.
But these three words might remain in silence, so please…

Take this, instead.
Pulled from my chest, still beating and red.
It’s battered and bruised and tender to the touch,
But it can still give so, so much.

Written by: CJ Embers

Words Unspoken

I wish, I wish, upon this star,
That time will heal this deep, ugly scar.
What is life but unending rain?
It’s the embodiment of all this pain.

I reap what I sow, reap what I sow,
But still I feel so damn low.
The one thing that I want…
It serves only to hurt and taunt.

Why must I be haunted by such trauma,
Pausing my life like a painful comma?
It’s nothing but a gun pressed under my chin;
Robbing me of joy like a deadly, deadly sin.

It is akin to a stagnant rot.
Nothing like this can ever be taught.
All I can do is try to endure,
And hope there will one day be a cure.

A big part of me had to die,
When made clear was the biggest lie.
Will my mind ever be unbroken?
Or will these words remain unspoken?

Written by: CJ Embers

The Other Shoe

“Follow my lead,
I’ll tell you what to do.
You’re not a burden;
I’m the same as you.”

You make me feel heard;
Comfortable and safe.
Is this what it’s like,
To finally have faith?

“Come to me,
And rest under my wing.
You are safe here;
Let Sanctuary’s bell ring.”

Pain does not exist here,
And I’ve learned to trust you.
My doubts are now gone;
It’s not too good to be true.

“Why do you act like this?
Don’t you know this is wrong?
You are far too much,
And you just don’t belong.”

But what you said…
I don’t understand.
Was it all a lie?
Why are you showing this hand?

“This is how it’s always been.
You should be ashamed.
This is your doing,
Because you are always to be blamed.”

I should have known.
Paradise was a lie,
Just as it always is.
Another to whom I say goodbye.

“Follow my lead,
But I will fault you.
You’ll be a burden,
When I drop the other shoe.”

Written by: CJ Embers


I try and I try, yet it all turns black.
Every time, I know it like it’s fact.
It burns like fire against my heart,
Shattering like dust, every single part.

“I promise,” it was said.
Just put a gun to my head instead.
It’s kinder than every lie,
And maybe then I can finally die.

Why does this feel so impossible?
It makes the darkness unstoppable.
Is this really my destiny?
Because I’m fighting for every breath in me.

This is how it will always be
Surely who is to blame but me?
I am spiraling. My life, uncontrollable.
Because all I’ve ever been… is completely disposable.

Written by: CJ Embers

The Reason

“Everything happens for a reason”,
Or so I’ve been told.
But maybe this world has long since been abandoned,
Because it has always felt cold.

What is reprieve from this void,
Except for a glaring lie?
Luring me like a siren,
Only to leave me to die.

Promises are never promises,
Only vows that are never kept.
Hope is but a burden;
A slow death as the sunlight still wept.

One by one they all do the same,
And I know it will remain that way.
This is why the choice has been made,
And I will try not to sway.

“Everything happens for a reason”,
Or so I used to believe.
But maybe there is no one else holding the knife,
And I just used to be naive.

Written by: CJ Embers


Every day is a battle
That only I can see
‘Normal’ makes my heart rattle
And smothers the real me

Existence often becomes a question of why
For who would want to live like this
Maybe it would be easier to say goodbye
Instead of living with this deadly kiss

Put on a mask
Don’t let them know
Lest they ask
And become a foe

Fear begets fear
Yet the silence is so loud
Everything is unclear
And I am never proud

Then came the bomb
When everything was broken
Yet my mind remained calm
Like courage quietly spoken

Will it shatter with one wrong move
Or have I actually begun to improve
Am I simply a coward who’s teetering on the brink
Or is it possible I am stronger than I think?

Written by: CJ Embers

Unfortunate News

Hey nerds! I’ve got bad news.

Unfortunately, I will be halting publications for the foreseeable future.

This is absolutely not by choice and I’m very sorry to anyone who was looking forward to the rest of the Ascension series this year as well as the continuation of the Emergent series next year.

I’m not going to air all my dirty laundry, but long story short, my life is starting pretty much one hundred percent over. Therefore any money I have* will be going towards attempting to get my life together again.

I’m hoping things will stabilize in a year, two at the most, but I can’t say for sure so I’m not making any promises.

*My BMAC will still be an option for those who may be interested in supporting my books. Anything given through there will still 100% stay as cover money.

So, here’s to wading through a steaming pile o’ shit and hopefully coming out the other side stronger for it. Or even just still alive would be good lol.

I’ll post an update when things have returned to normal!


The Ascension Vigil – Available Now!

I was wrong. The remnant wasn’t gone. It had only been in hiding, and now, everything I bled for is at risk.

With the consequences of Kena’s actions laid bare before her and the truth of her attempt at the Trial haunting her, she struggles to continue leading Karua. As the shadows of her recent past threatens to corrupt her once more, she must learn how to coexist with the memories of her god and his soul-shattering absence. Continue reading The Ascension Vigil – Available Now!

How the Third Edition of Dragons’ Myth is Different

The new edition of Dragons’ Myth is officially published (paperback. EBook coming July 1st), and that means I can explain the changes. This will have spoilers, so only read if you have read the previous edition or when you’ve finished the new edition. Or if you’re a weirdo who likes spoilers, you do you. Continue reading How the Third Edition of Dragons’ Myth is Different