I try and I try, yet it all turns black.
Every time, I know it like it’s fact.
It burns like fire against my heart,
Shattering like dust, every single part.
“I promise,” it was said.
Just put a gun to my head instead.
It’s kinder than every lie,
And maybe then I can finally die.
Why does this feel so impossible?
It makes the darkness unstoppable.
Is this really my destiny?
Because I’m fighting for every breath in me.
This is how it will always be
Surely who is to blame but me?
I am spiraling. My life, uncontrollable.
Because all I’ve ever been… is completely disposable.
Written by: CJ Embers
The words you speak are impeccable. The feeling you put into your words place me right in to the poem. I can feel the pain you have experienced and I hope things get better. Have you thought of making a book of poetry? It would be amazing.
Thank you so much 😊 I definitely have thought about making a poetry book! I’m not familiar with them though, so I would have to do a bit of research. And I’m assuming I’d need quite a few more poems to have enough for a book!